Everybody has a Microphone

I welcome your ability to believe the absolute worst in me.

Psychological warfare is flat and better suited for a nursery.

If shame worked for the best, I would be changed a long time ago.

Opaque intentions are clear to me, think of a chilled dish of lime Jello.

Don't kid yourself, you're enthralled by half of what I do and everything I say.

Should I close my eyes, and clasp my hands in silence, you would begin to pray.

What do you like on you pizza before I order, pineapple or peperoni?

Charm gets you so close before realizing that you don't know me.

Landing on Jupiter requires amazing luck to pass through a violent asteroid belt.

Exploratory satellites get crushed, so don't wonder why your impact was not felt.

One time is a coincidence, two times is an outright plan.

I stood at the finish line so when the starter pistol fired, nobody ran.

They knew to stay in their place and maybe you should learn yours

Do not flirt with my bad side simply because you are caught up on chores.

Pushing my buttons will only gift your psychiatrist a summer home.

Despite many critiques on my life, you have yet to leave me alone.

After shave burns, so does the realization that you are not that clever.

Relationships are like mattress tags, lots of warnings, but not hard to sever.